Thoughts During Major House Purge

There once was a gal with a mess
Which undoubtedly caused her some stress.
Tossing and purging got energy surging...
But it's challenging nevertheless.

I usually do a big cleaning and decluttering in the Fall and Spring...it's not a "plan" or something I do on a conscious schedule, but those seem to be the times when I really notice the mess and feel an unquenchable desire to conquer it. I always swear this will be the LAST time I will ever have to do this...when everything is finally organized perfectly THIS TIME, it will stay that way! But that never happens. I used to enjoy this process more - but like lots of things I am finding it more of a challenge than I used to, trying to do a big job and still interact with the kids. I get stressed trying to do multiple things at once - the Chaos is in my mind and the Chaos in the visible world seems to conspire against me and my sanity. The Chaoses have also also hired the Hormones to help them, maybe to break my figurative knees or put me in figurative cement shoes.

I am making progress though, and there is actually more incentive to do the job than there usually is. There is a good possibility my mother will be coming to live with us in the next few months, and since she will be getting one of the rooms, we have to find ways to do what we always do, with one less room. I don't want to be scrambling to get that done right before she comes. We are also going to paint a few rooms (including hers), and husband is going to build some floor-to-ceiling shelves on a few walls. He is also considering adding on a small room that would be his office when he starts his own plumbing business in the semi-near future. That room would be built into part of the garage, so that project would also entail moving the washer and dryer out of the garage. The plan for that is to make one of our bathrooms into a laundry room, leaving just a half-bath.

I am trying to get rid of things I have had for years, but which have never found the right place in the house, or are not sturdy, etc. I especially have a difficult time getting rid of furniture, but I think I am ready to cut one of the couches loose. I was actually considering getting rid of all the milk crates I have built shelves with for 20 years, but I don't think I can do that! I am using a very wide and deep closet for my art stuff - and I will use the crates in there. Husband is going to take the doors off the closet, so it will look like recessed shelves. I am no longer going to let my 7 year old Moppet have open access to my art supplies...while she usually cleans up and puts things away superficially, too often something is missing when I go to look for it. I have not been doing art at all for about 4 months, but I am getting ready to start back up, and I want my stuff to be there. I guess I will probably sort through my supplies and give her a lot of the older stuff, and restock what I need.

These days I never know why I am doing something. I have always had in the back of my mind that I should "do something" with whatever I am creating or producing. I should try to sell it, or whatever. But I have no desire to do that right now. I just want to learn how to do things I enjoy, just because I enjoy them. I don't want to be concerned about finished products. I am not good at living in the present, in general...and knowing how to do that is part of enjoying things for their own sake. I wonder if I will ever learn to do that, or if living so much in my head is just who I am?